sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
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