I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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