No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
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