Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Randomize
