we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
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