If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
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