and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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