So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
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