The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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