this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
