yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
Come see our sink grown plant.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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