I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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