I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
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