I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
