It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
