dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
