Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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