So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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