Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize