their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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