In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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