You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
