Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
You brought string cheese to the strip club
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
