Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Randomize
