Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
She bit a glass in half.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Randomize
