just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Randomize
