On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Randomize
