I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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