Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
