Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
