It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
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