Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
