let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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