hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Don't tell me you're on acid again
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