Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize
