My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
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