He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
