gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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