I love black thongs
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
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