So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
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