im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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