Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
