I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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