so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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