I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
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