Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
