I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
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