If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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