this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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