also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
It's just like the Real World with babies
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Randomize