So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
